Through The Looking Glass

*NOTE: This is not to be marked!! I posted this just for the fun of it!*

***

We look in
They look out
Those meanings say nothing
Those voices mean to the world as gold

Those messages, those words
Were only spoken from outsiders
Who cares not
Of our deep indifferences

We sing inwardly
They yell outwardly
Their eyes catch a fleeting image
Our eyes sigh in reverence from the unseen

We are not ghosts of the air
We are not the deceased
We are the unruly living
The Minds that truly speak.

The Drabbling Of A Very Bored Blogger

*Sigh* Once again I have procrastinated and am stuck with absolutely no topics in mind that’s worth presenting. So, (don’t worry, it won’t happen all the time) enjoy this story I made up. Maybe it’ll become a sort of background to a novel I’ll make in the future. Ms. Jess I promise that next week I’ll think of something else worth writing!!!

Dawn was waking, the dark rebelled its dominating warmth. A cold drift was swirling in this place, a look of the haunted reflected from the moon’s soft rays. Silence spread through the swampland and desert ways as quick and relentless as a wildfire. Soft croaks and echoes of voices could be heard from deep within the trees, radiating of memories long past.

The air was cool, piercing to the skin, but was quite moist and calm but from the ominous atmosphere coming in from deep within the ancient woods. From somewhere in the deep forest, an owl was heard hooting, its eyes bulged, its wings wrapped tight around its feathered body. It was soon silenced by the scolding darkness that challenged its rule.

In the middle of this bog, this wasteland, a stained, decrepit building stood high above the ground. Moss surrounded it; the smell of it left resemblance of the dead corpses that were flung into the hidden caverns and hiding places of the deep. Lights were seen to have flashed on and off during the winter; a further sign that the forest was alive and awake, filled with disfigured creatures of the night. This haunting feeling left even the bravest of men unable to respond to its taunting lure of death.

Many thought to have passed this place without trouble; others were thought to have been brutally killed. They were of course, rumours, but they were enough to frighten more than just children and creatures of the wild. They were just more to allow the sunken place its own ground of privacy.

On the other hand, there is a way in which the deceitful man had long forgotten to pass through this treacherous land. Beneath the whispering willows, between the roots that follow, a road was paved in the dirt. Gnomes and odd creatures of the dark were alleged to have built this mystery lane, but no one had ever seen such things for an endless set of ages. Rocks and potholes covered its ground; dripping waters ran along the trees’ branches and into the earth. Musical songs echoed its gateways with its long stanzas and rhymes.

Long before men wandered the world, such celebrations were made upon the coming of winter, the wet dew of spring, the blooming of summer and the wilting of fall. But all of that ceased to exist. Whispers and secrets buried the creatures alive in their hate and sorrow. If they were ever to come to the surface, to seek out what lies above, the sun and the moon would surely destroy them all, sending their hated souls to the underworld to be judged. For centuries upon centuries, worlds within worlds passed by time and yet the road remained undisturbed.

Until Now.

A rackety cart drove by this lane; it was carrying something more than what was expected. A man steered the mule in front, his eyes darted to and fro from fear. His clothes were torn, sprayed with blood; his head was wrapped with worn bandages. He continued to look back into the cart and his black fear began to grow. He whipped the poor animal in front of him with anxiety and the mule galloped as fast as its legs were able to carry, which wasn’t at all swift.

Moans, whines and whimpers could be softly heard within the remains of the cart. The driver peered back and cursed. The sun was slowly emerging from the horizon and light slowly crept into the ends of the swamp land. The man gripped his blackened jacket tighter and prodded the mule to quicken its pace. The man felt sweat coming down his beaten face, his hands were now shaking. The reins he held tightly in his hands were beginning to slip and tangle with his fingers.

Time was against them.

The lane was now narrowing and soon a sharp bend was seen. Many had already gone over its edge, falling mercilessly into the ravine tucked safely underneath it. The driver, now blinded by his distress and alarm from the sun's apperance, did not realize what a speed he had handled the mule with. By the time he had absorbed the dangers of the nearby bend, it was already upon him. With his life on the line, he pulled on the reins and held on for dear life.

The mule, who responded to the order dumbly, lifted its forelegs high in the air before it collapsed into the ditch beside the lane. The cart, in its still heavy weight, pulled it down; the reins were nonetheless held increasingly rigid by the old man. The mule, terrified at this peril, tried in vain to keep its balance steady to withstand the pressure brought down on it. The cart soon dragged it down into the darkness below, its frightened brays left unnoticed from the outside.

A sudden clamour of noise echoed throughout the swamp land. Pieces of dark wood was scarred and embedded into the ground, blood was spilt on the trees. At the bottom of the hill the doomed cart lay in an endless pool of red and of wood and of scattered debris left behind by dead carcasses. On the edge of the blood-stained area a brown sheet of cloth lie in tatters. When one looks close enough, they could see a small fist hanging from beneath the sheets.

Voices unexpectedly arose in chatter and screeches. The forest filled with trees of obscurity now was filled with red glowing eyes. Their pitches vibrated throughout the lands, haunting travellers as they go. As the chants of their primitive but penetrating ways increased in volume, a head of green came out of the burnt trees; its disfigured hands held each a dagger. Shadows were darting to and fro the forest, dark figures clamouring close and dispersing into the ominous gloom. Suddenly, the dreaded creature appeared out of its hiding place among the forest dark, its grotesque face contorting with pleasure.

Gigantic, hovering and with a posture of ruthless authority, the green devil roared. The other glowing eyes that hid in the dark were wounded by its calls. The ground shook; the mountains were forced out of their own territory. The swamplands then endured a silence that would have cut even a million soldiers in two.

Another head stuck out, its red eyes bulged in the same repulsive manner, its mouth wide open. A place colour of yellow could be seen in its mouth, a strange red colour stood in its fangs. Its ears were demented, its colour unchanging though the shadows blocked most of its figure. Soon many others jumped out of the darkness called their home and surrounded the mess of debris the cart had made. With another shriek, the revolting and atrocious giant that appeared whole first picked up a dead man by the head and laughed. The green monsters then began looking, hunting. Soon, more bodies were found; dead by the impact of the cart. They all shrieked in unison at their finds.

As the party of beasts continued to feast on the blood that poured upon them, the brown cloth that miraculously landed far from the cart was discovered. Safely concealed in overgrown bushes, the small piece of cloth lay there with stillness until a white endless stream of light neared it. A gloved hand came down and searched the bushes. After sometime, it felt a figure, a body, a shape and the hand lifted the covers of the cloth in frantic desperation. A gasp escaped from the man and his hand trembled slightly. A baby, with its forehead spilling with blood, was breathing; the poor thing was alive! Another hand quickly shot out and bundled the tiny babe in a new piece of cloth. The man gathered the small thing in his arms and swiftly, slyly manoeuvred across the forest.

Dawn was now illuminating its boundaries and expanding its warmth. The forest now burst into colours as flowers, plants and animals alike took their heads out of their hiding place to witness the war won by the light over darkness. The man, however, was in no mood to celebrate.

Cloaked with a long hooded mantle, the eager man ran elegantly but dangerously up the hills to where the lane was located. He knew of the dangers if he were to be caught. He also knew of the many enemies that hunted for him day and night. He clutched the tiny babe tighter and continued to jog up the unstable hillsides. Rocks began to slide from above him and he climbed the rest of the way with the baby wrapped in a bundle behind his back. Slowly and with pain, the man reached the top of the bend and dashed out of the tunnels and dripping trees. This was a place of evil and no one had been able to escape its claws for long.

Soundlessly, the man inconspicuously treaded the roadway, arousing the dust to swirl and fade away as he ran. He reached the end of the road and stepped into the bushes beside. Chanting was softly heard from afar and soon enough a band of horrendous soldiers marched like dead wraiths with their glowing eyes. The man crouched and leaned against the safety of the leaves that hid him and the babe, praying that they would not be discovered.

He held his breath as each row of soldiers passed his place, his arms coiled around his thin body that enabled him to crouch in positions a bulked man cannot. Droning sounds reached to his ears, buzzing music zoomed past by him. The ground shook, the trees moaned in pain and the man was thrown deeper into the forest by an unnatural force. The baby, still attached to his back, stumbled along with him into the darkness that bound them keep.

So what do you think? To be honest, I wrote this from the previous months…I had to do a major makeover, though, on the entire thing and had to edit most of its grammar…Anyway, hoped you enjoyed it!

OS-Girls/OS-Tan - Personification of our beloved Operating System!

I somehow managed to run into these during my leisure time browsing for a better OS (Operating System) and in a search for an extra-efficient software. Immediately after watching (and witnessing the glory of Japanese pop culture), I trash my attempt, and am in love with my current OS!

This might be good 'eye-candy' to some boys (to my dissapointment, most A1-HL students were female) and, probably, prevent you from constantly harrassing and raping your PC and your OS! You'll get what I mean after you read further...

Meet the OS-girls (or OS-Tan in Japanese)! These young ladies were direct personification of your beloved Operating System-you get me: Microsoft Windows series! First off, what is 'OS-Tan'?

BTW: 'Tan' is a Japanese suffix-a mispronounciation of 'chan' and is an informal, diminutive, and intimate honorific suffix use for friends, families, or pets in Japan.

OS-Tan is an internet phenomenon originated in Japan's Futaba Channel (an image board dealing with Japan's otakuness and underground pop culture-similair to 4chan, yet much older). They are the personification of several Operating System (hence, OS)-typically Microsoft Windows-by various amateur Japanese artists. But don't let it fool you! Each and every OS-tans' personality depicted its Microsoft Windows OS flaws and plusses, and they're personality were thoroughly consistent despite varying artists! They were commonly depicted as sisters with varying age.

So without further adieu, I'll gladly introduce you to the Microsoft Windows Sisters!

Meet 98-tan! Representitive of Windows 98, and the youngest of the Microsoft Windows sisters (or depicted as the youngest). She's depicted in a white and blue uniform that includes the Windows logo as part of a neck tie, navy blue hair, and a "98" hair clip. Did I mentioned 'they'? No? Surprise, surprise! They are a pair of young girls-precisely, twins. The sister of 98-tan is no other than 98SE-tan (right picture) and though depicted as twins, 98SE-tan wears a green sailor uniform with the logo 'SE' plastered on the front. They're also accompanied by two crayon-decorated pocky boxes that serves as their weapon and their 'mech' (parody for Gundam)

This here is Me-tan, a hard working character yet unstable, and is found often 'crashing', 'freezing', went out of control, and failing at almost everything she do-concluded with the irritation of her sisters. Besides her clumsiness, she is depicted to have a lack of common sense by performing illiterate actions such as microwaving a can of soda or using spring onions/scallions as a weapon of defence. Ironically, the personification of Microsoft Windows Millenium Edition (hence Me) is true to the OS-Tan; criticized to own many unnecessary and useless affiliations, as well as the difficulty it gives for user to install it, run it, getting it to work with other softwares, and lastly-getting it to stop running. She is commonly pictured with green hair and pigtails, wearing a maid outfit with a '!' branded on its chest in the spirit of Window's 'Restore Desktop' icon or the yellow error icon. She is also pictured to possess the power of 'The Blue Screen of Death' (Crash).

Behold! My OS and the OS-tan representing it! Meet XP-tan! She is the sister of the degraded Me-tan and is depicted wearing an 'XP' hair decoration. With the criticism of Windows XP for 'bloating a system and being very preety without being so useful', she is often drawn wearing tight clothes and large *coughcough* breasts. Not only that, she is known to have an-with reference to Windows XP's memory usage-appetite and is sometimes pictured eating or holding an empty rice bowl labeled 'memory'. The twin sister of her, XP Home or 'Homeko' is depicted with green hair in short ponytails with two large 'XP'-shaped hairclips covering her ears. Homeko-tan comes with a glasses, and a slightly different personality than XP-tan.

The intelligent, reserved, and professional of all the sisters is no other than 2K-tan; the representation of Microsoft Windows 2000. She is drawn and depicted with short blue hair, glasses, and hair ornaments resembling cat ears flanking a smaller maid's bonnet with Window's logo. Often found wearing Japanese swim suit and a long blue coat as a standard uniform, and possess as broad sword as her weapon of choice. Due to the popularity of Windows 2K as the most common, stable, and dependable OS-as well as the stability it presents-2K-tan is shown as the guardian of the sisters-specifically Me-tan, found often stressing her and the her sisters due to Me-tan's erratic actions. Though reserved, 2K-tan is known as a caring OS-tan by her sisters. She is commonly found lingering with XP-tan and Me-tan and are three of the most favoured OS-tan (Me-tan, XP-tan, 2K-tan).

The eldest, and the most gentle-looking OS-tan out of all the sisters. 95-tan is pictured wearing a traditional kimono, commonly worn by college student during the Meiji-Taisho era of Japan-the modernization of Japan. She uses a ribbon bearing the four colors of windows, and uses a geta-a Japanese traditional sandal-as her footwear. This, in fact, is also a reference to the modernization of Windows in 1998. She is often seen wielding a Katana-in which it symbolizes that in her time (1998), Microsoft Windows achieved full dominance of the PC Market. Other than her physical appearance, she is often engaged in tea ceremonies, preparing and serving meals, as well as doing other housework-in reference to the usefulness of Windows 98. However, she is known to have the unfamiliarity of post-Windows 98 technologies such as USB devices and broadband internet connections.

...And that's all the 'Microsoft Windows sisters'! Of course, I could kept blabbing about other OS-tan like MAC-Tan (MAC OS X), Dr. Symantec (Symantec Anti-Virus), and XBox-tan or Wii-tan-all starring in an imaginary Anime series 'Troubled Windows'. With the introduction of these imaginary characters, I do hope we're encouraged to care for our PC and-especially-our OS more.

Here's a fan-made video showing all computer-based OS-tan! (with extra buffed Bill Gates!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1nmwjQnJhBQ&mode=related&search=

Hypocrite.

Note: If you only skim through it, you'll find the message unclear. If you analyze it, you'll still find the message conveyed through this poem quite vague. It's my thoughts on things that happened a few days ago. Oh, and the cat's a personification of something.

Enjoy!

This is your code.
You respect and live by it.

You earn it; gain it.

And you promise never to lose it.

Ever.

You lock it up deep in your soul.

You thought: "If one were to have it, one'd have to earn it."

And we all did.

But was it worth the time?

You held it up high so the world can see

that this is what they should call: a good example,

a worthy trait, a priceless gift;

an essence so pure, so heartwarming.

It strengthen friendships, and weaken enemies,

it produces smiles, and wipes off tears.

It's yours, and ours.

You'll never let go of it, never forsake it.

Ever.

Then another came, attracting your attention.

A beautiful murderer, as souless as Death.

It glided towards you as it touches your skin ever so slightly;

and it landed on your lap, innocently purring.

You held and caressed it, taking notice of its appearance;

forgetting all about it, discarding it. Breaking a promise.

Shocking as it may be, you took it and fed it

to your new friend, the cat.

The cat has its trait, its essence, its similarities.

But it was far from perfect; too inferior.

Still, you were blinded by its mystery.

Your fascination grew like weeds.

You threw it away for a feline friend,

have you gone mad, child?

Time changes the soul, they say.

Does this imply to you too?

Meticulously,

the feline watches your every move.

You've made a mistake, and you'll have to pay the price.

So watch out, dear child, watch out.

What's the point?

Right at this very moment, I wonder. What is the point of life? The point of all this hard work in IB and the painful so-called relationships we have each day? Simply to have those special great rare days that seems so far from me right now?

I'm at lost for words, cause it simply isn't enough for me. So I am selfish, we all are. Life at this point isn't enough, as students going through IB shouldn't we go through it with a firm foundation of assurance and a mind set. Where have mine gone? I've turned bitter and dark; the hope that use to illuminated all around seem to have all disappeared and I'm left with only bits and pieces of my life. Where have I gone wrong?

I use to be that small girl running around with nothing to worry about and full with the vest for life. That girl who has the smile to brighten anyones day, the smile that infects everyone around her to do the same. Happy that that bright smiling girl is happy.

I use to love like I've never loved before. To love openly and freely. To be unafraid of the consequences and pain love might bring into my life. I was that girl, happy to give and receive whatever the world throws at me, with an open heart and a pure soul. I realize now what a fool I was, how oblivious I was to those that was right in front of me.

Where am I, Lord? I've ran away from everything that has came close to me. Not wanting, unyielding, I want no one else but You. Cause I know You won't hurt me, I know You'll protect me, I know that I'll be safe with You.

I'm lost... I long for the day I'll spend eternity in the paradise You've made me.

Parental actions and its Reflections

Procrastination and procrastinator~! Isn't it the greatest word to describe this small little entry and-to an extent-the writters of this blogspot (no offense meant)?


Oh well, rather than spending my time on chit-chatting mindless idiocy, might as well get to the point.

A few days ago, a friend of mine confronted me and asks for a council. Knowing him/her fully, I decided to give this a go-in hopes I didn't screw his/her life even further.

The conversation occupies a whole lunch period (good thing we brought lunch), as well as an additional 2 minute from the 5 minute countdown to class. It didn't bother me, really-what bothers me is the fact on why he/she confronted me for.

Parents. They are your source, your origin. The two figure who breathe life into you and raise you in such a way that someday you too, would achive success in a distant future and breathe life to another. Yet how far do they impact our life? Our personality? Our way of thinking...?

They are characters (besides friends and foes) who set examples to you, in hopes that you too would be as much like them-or better, excels them.


...But what if such examples were in a form of abuse? What if they 'enslave' you? How would you feel? How would you react?

For years, never have I caught wind of any ill-fated child under the constant oppression and abusement of parents-and to confront one in reality. Knowing and acknowledging the fact that this is in our school community disturbs me greatly.

I have known him/her for years, and by know I can vaguely picture the reason 'why' he/she has little or no friends at all. Some reports I've heard consists on how he/she treated others-some says he/she is rude to an intollerable extent. I confronted him/her to reason with and eventually, this is where I came to be.

In one way or another, your father or mother is reflected through you-there is no deny to it. If a parent teach they're offsprings with terror, then they (the offspring) will give terror. If a parent teach they're offsprings to fear, then they will plague others with fear. But if a parent teach they're offsprings with love, then they will present love.

If a parent abuse you, teach you how to fear and respect them using physical power and verbal degradation of a status, then you too would unknowingly abuse and degrade others without second thoughts-acceptable or not. If they treated you with constant verbal humiliation, mockings, and discouragement then you will then treat others with constant verbal humiliation, mockings, and discouragement. Or in a second effect, the thought of how low you are would haunt you.

From here, a social outcast is born from the midst of the constant mockings, discouragement, and both physical and verbal degradation given by your parents-the person you wish and seek for help the most in times of need.
Is the effect reversible? It is. As parents are the foundation that influences us, friends became the number 1 influencing source. As you grow older, you would spend time longer with your friends than your family; and this is where they play major part in your life developing you-whether good or bad.
But are such actions simple? It isn't. Social outcasts tends to be socially clueless, and would prefer to be seeked than to seek-a trait that both benefits and decimates the character. They would tend to be avoided, and if they do socialize it wouldn't take long for them to evolve into a public enemy-either by word, or treatment.

By now, I am unsure on what to do in an attempt to reach out and guide him/her to better sociallize. An attempt that seems futile, yet has a 10-20% success rate possibility. As for this time, I have noticed how limited his/her allies are; which is a possible reason as one of the obstacle to why he/she has a hard time sociallizing. Then again, the traces on why he/she is leads to the way his/her parents treatment.


As a quote says somewhere: "We are, after all, cheap copies of our parents"

What The Future Holds

*Yeah, so I procrastinated this week’s blog, so again forgive me this very bad entry because I seriously am writing as I go along with absolutely no structure in mind. Just a warning*

Ten, twenty years from now, where would we all be? The sheer thought of the future somewhat seem daunting, at least to me. In perfect honesty, I often wonder where I would be three, four years ahead of my life, confused whether I am ready to journey on to womanhood and grapple the task of being an adult. At the present moment, high school is taking up my life, consuming my time and filling the gaps of boredom which I normally would have felt during an idle summer. Where and what I would do when I finally graduate, finish university, with all that supposed free time on my hands?

I have to admit, the future involves, for me, a shrouded and blurry vision of what I assumed I would be. All my hopes and dreams; would they come true or would they turn into an impossibility that I cannot but help follow? Not only that, would I be able to handle the various responsibilities which would fall and ask of me as soon as I turn into an adult? The future holds nothing but uncertainties and I often worry about it, wondering if I spent my life accordingly and to the full so that when I die, I would have at least left some mark upon the world.

In times when I feel melancholy and anxious about whether or not I was ready to confront the future, it is also equally comforting to realize that God had planned all of this life for me, that I don’t have to worry, and that I don’t have to be anxious about what I was called to do. To some, this type of thinking that a God created a mould in which we are to fill is restrictive and an awful way to live out life.

On the contrary, I know that if there is a God who plans and knows where our lives would lead, it would be sufficient enough to trust him. Of course, the future lies in our hands as the saying goes, “God helps those who help themselves”. The trouble is that many of our mistakes and bungles committed in this life would cost us happiness and our dreams and hopes. That mainly is the reason why I worry about the future; the wonder whether or not I would be able to make the right decisions and choices without costing them my chances of success in life!

At present, assignments, tests and homework dominate my life. When I was younger, I desired for school to end, and now I do not even have to wish for the next holiday to come when it is already upon me. I was caught unaware due to the mounts of work we have to do which quickened the weeks. Now, the prospect of facing the future is inevitable. Soon, all of us Grade 11s would tackle EE, panic over exams, and finally, apply to universities which would determine our separate pathways. What would happen next after that? Would some of us apply for jobs and become successful? Or would the rest simply go on with their lives, applying for more universities to become doctors, lawyers or other work? The future holds so many uncertainties that I am glad that at least one knows where I would be and what I would be twenty years from now.

*Like I said before, this entry is not one of best ones. I wrote it because I didn't know what else to write about. I hate writer's block! The idea of the future had always frightened me though. How about you? What do you think?*